Spiders, Scorpions & The Crawlies

Thu, Jan 31, 2008 (Rating: 5 stars, Click to rate this article!) Loading ...

A friend… an ex-friend of mine, Brian Fernandes, sent this to me tonight while I was sitting at my computer doing the internet.

First our conversation opens up with him sending me this picture:

and at first glance I think “That’s a big spider” then I think “… but who cares?”… I let it sink in a bit longer and then realized the spider was in a house some where, because of the molding around the corner of the wall there… my guess is a ceiling.

Then I realized that for someone to take a picture like this, they liked walked into a home or hotel for the first time and saw it… meaning this nest full of fuck was growing inside a building somewhere. Then I got the willies…

Brian then sent along a link to a comment from JFreezy left for the story that originally hosted the image above, and it was pretty funny:

I was in Zimbabwe Africa once (don’t ask why, it’s a long story) and the lodge we stayed in was freaking infested with spiders about that size! We spent about 3 hours going around our room killing them so we could sleep without worring about them eating our faces in the middle of the night. In the above comment, Spinksy was 100% correct about the death by flame method! We found one spider that was so huge, when I tried to smash it with a boot I only hit its leg and its LEG left a splatter mark in the wall!! JUST ITS LEG!! So we busted out the makeshift flamethrower (hairspray and lighter) and torched that sucker from 3 inches away. It dropped off the wall, ran like a spider out of hell under a couch! We all screamed like little girls as we watched the couch go up in flames! We put the couch out and found the body hanging from a spring inside the couch. That experience will be burned (no pun intended lol!) into my mind forever! Lesson learned: fire doesn’t solve everything LOL!

… are you freaking serious? Spiders so big he’s having concerns with how to crush them with his shoe?

At this point, I don’t just have the willies… I am more or less making a pool of gasoline around myself that I am prepared to light at the first sign of movement in the house (cats not withstanding).

Anyway, at this point our friendship is in shambles… I have the willies and hate Brian and he decides why not go for broke? So he follows up with this shining example of why mankind should make pocket-sized atomic bombs:

I think their nick names are “Camel Spider” or something, but they are essentially tailless whip scorpions, we even have them here in the states. I got this picture of one fighting and eating a normal scorpion at my parent’s house a few years ago:

and to top it all off, he finally sends me a movie of one of these things eating a lizard… yea… not a bug, or a butterfly… or a seed… or some lint… oh no, it was eating a lizard

So my plan so far is to simply avoid sleep tonight, and to stay up with my nightvision goggles on, watching the floor… and waiting.

Thanks Buddy!

Update #1: He just sent me this:

That, right there, is like being in an argument with a friend, and burning his house down to make amends…

Update #2: Jens Eckels just added this wonderful bit to the story… “Let’s not forget what happens when you get bitten by a spider (Brown Recluse)”:

Thanks buddy… <vomits bile all over desk and falls backwards out of chair>

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bite, disgusting, Humor and Fun, scorpions, spider

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12 Comments For This Post

Brian Fernandes Says:
January 31st, 2008 at 10:32 am

Riyad, I feel really bad about all this; I hope I can win you back with this: http://tinyurl.com/yups9e

Riyad Kalla Says:
January 31st, 2008 at 11:14 am

Hahah, omg… that is a spider eating a chicken… just the type of spider I’d like to meet in a dark alley

tdod Says:
January 31st, 2008 at 11:37 am

o.m.g…

I decided to read the blog today while taking a quick break to eat lunch. BAD MOVE. I can hander spiders and even scorpions, but that last picture of the… hand… and a spider bite? Honestly, my gut was considering whether to purge the food I was in the process of eating.

Riyad, I think this is the end of our friendship.

Anonymous Says:
May 22nd, 2008 at 7:43 am

That was NASTY!!!!!

Anonymous Says:
May 24th, 2008 at 8:31 pm

ohkay black widows are not that big and are BLACK!

Riyad Kalla Says:
May 25th, 2008 at 8:24 am

Anonymous, those weren’t black widows… those are Space Death-Spiders!

Seriously, you probably wouldn’t want to argue with one.

Matt Says:
June 9th, 2008 at 9:57 pm

Oh Jesus! I’ll never f’ing sleep again!

Riyad Kalla Says:
June 10th, 2008 at 8:26 am

Matt, probably a good idea. I’d also encourage you to lay in bed, with your eyes open, holding a flame thrower if possible just incase…

Wallie Says:
July 17th, 2008 at 6:10 pm

AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

mUns!!!!

Anonymous Says:
July 30th, 2008 at 1:15 am

What kind of Tarantula is that huge brown one??

(2nd to last picture of the person holding it with two hands)

Jessica Says:
July 30th, 2008 at 1:17 am

please email me the answer to that question (about the brown tarantula).

Riyad Kalla Says:
July 30th, 2008 at 8:06 am

Jessica,
I’m not sure exactly the species, but I thought you might be asking because you wanted one.

I did a search for the more docile breeds of tarantula and came up with this:

There are no “docile’ tarantulas - only specimens within species that are more tolerant of being handled than others! Grammostola aureostriata, Eupalaestrus spp. and B. smithi are very tolerant of handling as are some of the other Brachypelma spp. and some Avicularia spp. especially, A. avicularia. Stay away from any theraphosid from the Old World regions i.e. Africa, India, Asia, etc. from taxa such as Haplopelma, Poecilotheria, Thrigmopoeus, Selenocosmia, Chilobrachys, Pterinochilus, Augacephalus, Stromatopelma, Hysterocrates, Phoneyusa, etc. And, New World tarantulas of the taxa Lasiodora, Ephebopus, Megaphobema, Pamphobeteus, Xenesthis, Nhandu, Acanthoscurria, etc.
Also, remember that not all specimens within a species will possess the same temperament. Grammostola rosea (the common rosehair tarantula) is commonly recommended as a ‘good’ beginner species, as is Aphonopelma seemanni. However, there exists a great variance in temperaments among specimens of both species and temperaments may change from one stadium to the next.
In my opinion, G. aureostriata, A. avicularia and B. smithi are three of the best “docile” tarantulas. Of all theraphosids, I’d go with A. avicularia as the most inoffensive and “docile” species.

(original link)

and then also found this link too for you: top 10 tarantulas

Hope that helps.

Brian Fernandes Says:
January 31st, 2008 at 10:32 am
Riyad, I feel really bad about all this; I hope I can win you back with this: http://tinyurl.com/yups9e
Riyad Kalla Says:
January 31st, 2008 at 11:14 am
Hahah, omg… that is a spider eating a chicken… just the type of spider I’d like to meet in a dark alley
tdod Says:
January 31st, 2008 at 11:37 am
o.m.g…

I decided to read the blog today while taking a quick break to eat lunch. BAD MOVE. I can hander spiders and even scorpions, but that last picture of the… hand… and a spider bite? Honestly, my gut was considering whether to purge the food I was in the process of eating.

Riyad, I think this is the end of our friendship.
Anonymous Says:
May 22nd, 2008 at 7:43 am
That was NASTY!!!!!
Anonymous Says:
May 24th, 2008 at 8:31 pm
ohkay black widows are not that big and are BLACK!
Riyad Kalla Says:
May 25th, 2008 at 8:24 am
Anonymous, those weren’t black widows… those are Space Death-Spiders!

Seriously, you probably wouldn’t want to argue with one.
Matt Says:
June 9th, 2008 at 9:57 pm
Oh Jesus! I’ll never f’ing sleep again!
Riyad Kalla Says:
June 10th, 2008 at 8:26 am
Matt, probably a good idea. I’d also encourage you to lay in bed, with your eyes open, holding a flame thrower if possible just incase…
Wallie Says:
July 17th, 2008 at 6:10 pm
AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

mUns!!!!
Anonymous Says:
July 30th, 2008 at 1:15 am
What kind of Tarantula is that huge brown one??

(2nd to last picture of the person holding it with two hands)
Jessica Says:
July 30th, 2008 at 1:17 am
please email me the answer to that question (about the brown tarantula).
Riyad Kalla Says:
July 30th, 2008 at 8:06 am
Jessica,
I’m not sure exactly the species, but I thought you might be asking because you wanted one.

I did a search for the more docile breeds of tarantula and came up with this:

There are no “docile’ tarantulas - only specimens within species that are more tolerant of being handled than others! Grammostola aureostriata, Eupalaestrus spp. and B. smithi are very tolerant of handling as are some of the other Brachypelma spp. and some Avicularia spp. especially, A. avicularia. Stay away from any theraphosid from the Old World regions i.e. Africa, India, Asia, etc. from taxa such as Haplopelma, Poecilotheria, Thrigmopoeus, Selenocosmia, Chilobrachys, Pterinochilus, Augacephalus, Stromatopelma, Hysterocrates, Phoneyusa, etc. And, New World tarantulas of the taxa Lasiodora, Ephebopus, Megaphobema, Pamphobeteus, Xenesthis, Nhandu, Acanthoscurria, etc.
Also, remember that not all specimens within a species will possess the same temperament. Grammostola rosea (the common rosehair tarantula) is commonly recommended as a ‘good’ beginner species, as is Aphonopelma seemanni. However, there exists a great variance in temperaments among specimens of both species and temperaments may change from one stadium to the next.
In my opinion, G. aureostriata, A. avicularia and B. smithi are three of the best “docile” tarantulas. Of all theraphosids, I’d go with A. avicularia as the most inoffensive and “docile” species.

(original link)

and then also found this link too for you: top 10 tarantulas

Hope that helps.

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