The Left 4 Dead ones were posted by beavotron on the Penny Arcade Forums.  He also provides a printable PDF for anyone interested.

This second set of Valentines comes directly from Blizzard.  All three StarCraft II Valentines can be downloaded in multiple sizes for printing or use as wallpaper.

I don’t know about you but personally the idea of a Nerf gun that fires 500 shots in a minute sounds like a lot of fun.  Fortunately, the guys over at Mana Energy Potion have hacked the Nerf Vulcan EBF-25 to fire “about as fast as a 7.62mm M60 Machine gun,” that is roughly the equivalent of 500 rounds-per-minute.

The best part is that the Mana Energy Potion guys were kind enough to list out all the steps the took to mod the Vulcan EBF-25.  You can get the full steps with pictures here, but here is the quick breakdown.

1. Increase the voltage to the motor
2. Add an LED round counter
3. Paint to your preferred design
4. Shoot someone

So it started off with me dancing a bit, and just doing the sorts of gestures the game has available to make people like you and fall in love with you. This includes blowing kisses, whistling, doing a sock puppet show, showing off my muscles and asking them to follow me. I decided to forgo the farting expression because while you can make them laugh with you, there is also the risk of shitting your pants at which point they will be laughing at you. So I did my thing, laid my game down as it were and the women were interested. They were falling in love and sounded like they were trying to get up on my virtual pants-business. So far so good. According to the strategy guide, the instruction booklet, and the advice of friends, the next move is to get them to follow you to bed. Then you activate the bed and activate her G-spot… just like real life. What happened was that I accidentally got married, had to buy a house with half of my new sword money, get ragged on by my new wife about where we lived, my appearance, and how much money I was giving her every day. Then, after finally managing to fuck her, she got pregnant and I had a kid.

Holy fucking shit.

I totally want this game now… it reminds me of the first time I got The Sims. The first thing I did was:

1. Marry
2. Have a Child
3. Put the child in the bathroom with a lot of windows into the living room in the wall of the bathroom
4. Wall up the bathroom and made my wife watch it die
5. Then walled her up in the bedroom until she died

I can’t tell if I’m sick or as a software designer, if I just wanted to see if the designers had actually specified logic for all these scenarions.

… incase you are wondering, they did.

Every once in a while an application gets an update that is so incredible… so intense… so advanced, that it blows your mind… or is 2.6 Terabytes

While this is of course just a text snaffu, it gave me a good chuckle. After applying the update to Foxit Reader I was happy to see that it has a streamlined interface making it a bit sexier while still maintaining the tight footprint that makes it my preferred PDF-reader choice over Adobe’s Acrobloat Reader (did you see what I did there? That was a lame-burn right there…)

First thing that popped in my head when I saw it was “Where can I get one?”… even though I’d have absolutely no place to put it and I’m more or less certain my wife wouldn’t be thrilled about our living room being completely filled up with it… I still want it.

I’ll put it outside with a sign that says: “Property is Protected by Android” and color the eyes red. It will be like those Sphinx guardians from The Neverending Story, except without the boobs:

If you visit IMDB you’ll see the same old site we’ve always seen for like 15 years now:

but if you look up at the top of the page, there is a big link for “Preview IMDB’s new look!”, when you click it… get ready for your face to melt off:

That’s right folks, IMDB’s site redesign basically redefines the Web, and if you can’t see the difference between the two layouts then you just aren’t cool enough I guess.

P.S.> If anyone actually knows what the difference is between these two layouts, we’d love to know.

Cool… just visit their job site: rim.jobs

That’s pretty awesome that they have enough of a sense of humor to set that up.

Thanks Dave Bullock!

Here’s #6:

And the rest:

• Crysis on Crack 5
• Crysis on Crack 4
• Crysis on Crack 3
• Crysis on Crack 2
• Crysis on Crack 1

I basically tried to find a reason to post the picture above, and this story was exactly that reason.

Click here to view the embedded video.

These videos are always morbidly interesting, click to watch the security video and cell-video of a guy flipping out at work.

Update #1: Eugene gave us the heads up that this is actually a viral video for the upcoming Angelina Jolie movie “Wanted”, check it out:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Thanks Eugene!

F*ck the Earth Day – Watch more free videos

Really Gross Spider Bite – Watch more free videos

So I was looking on Netflix to see how I scored Hitman after a friend asked me about it, and noticed down in the “More Like This” section where Netflix recommends more movies to you… it was telling me if I liked Hitman (Action movie, gore, full frontal nudity) that I might like Cesar Milan: Dog Whisperer… now I’ve actually watched a season of Cesar Milan, and I don’t remember any of those things (action, gore, nudity) happening… maybe I should have watched Season 2?

In all seriousness Netflix’s recommendation system is usually as good as Amazon’s I find, which is surprisingly good.

Brad Agdern sent in a website to keep the internet-awesome-rolling. Welcome to MySpace Douchebags, a site where you can submit any douchebag to be reviewed in complete douche-baggery.

You have a friend on MySpace that posted a ridiculous picture of them self trying to look cool? Or maybe you see a page of someone that just looks like a freaking retard?

Send it in! Oh… and here’s one more for the road:

What? Not that awesome? Then how about these super-badasses?

You really have to appreciate the puckered girl-libs and overtanning… oh and the way-too-open-shirts.

For some celebrity awesome, check out some other good ones:

• Paris Hilton’s Never-Changing Expression
• Lindsay Lohan’s Never-Changing Pose

Update #1: Oh jesus yes, MORE! Check it yo!

This guy killed like 700 cops and runs the bitches off of main street:

and this guy has so much money from drug dealing that he has to shoot his own money:

Target Practice – Watch more free videos

Marc Chung just sent this in, it’s awesome. Google Maps – Street View looks like it grabbed a great place in town to buy some crack

and now something adorable: